Fear of Falling

seamless and steady as one voice. The music wrapped around us, guiding our fingers and tongues. The rest of the A.D. girls caught onto the melody and began to improvise with their own instruments.
    I was there—that sweet spot where everything came together. The picture was no longer blurry; I could see it—I could see Blaine—as clear as day. And I no longer played my guitar; I became it. I no longer sang; I was song.
    But now you see
    The mess that I’ve made
    Feeling so desperate
    Just wanted the pain to fade
    Time and time again
    Tried to push you away
    I know that I’m crazy
    But you make it okay
    Blaine’s eyes never strayed from mine as he sat as still as stone. Even when some bleach blonde bimbo tried to grab his attention, he was unmovable. Unshakable. Just as he had always been. Blaine was a constant. My constant. Somehow he had become just as necessary to me as Dom or Angel. He had become my family.
    As we neared the conclusion, I let my eyes close and just… felt. I let the emotions those lyrics evoked flood through me. I let the truth of those words set me free from fear and worry.
    This wasn’t only for Blaine. No, this was the Emancipation of Kami Duvall. The once broken girl who had put herself back together. The scared child that survived even when she didn’t have the will to. I kissed that little girl goodbye. I let go of the fear that had been my only friend at times. I didn’t need it anymore. I had love.
    I’m not afraid
    Of monsters and ghosts
    But the thought of losing you
    Is what scares me the most
    I opened my eyes once the song ended, and Blaine was right below me, standing at the edge of the stage. His cheeks glistened with tears, and his deep brown eyes were rimmed with red. The sight of him sent a surge of courage through my veins, and I stripped off my guitar and handed it to Angel before jumping down to join him below. I didn’t even hear the raucous cheers and claps. I just needed to hear his voice, telling me that it wasn’t too late. That I hadn’t lost him.
    “Hey, roadrunner, where’d you go?” he asked in a raspy voice.
    I smiled. “I thought I told you not to call me that.”
    “I thought you were done running.”
    I nodded. He was right. He always called me on my bullshit, and that’s exactly what I had been afraid of. He saw me for what I was.
    “I am. I have nowhere else to go. Nowhere else I’d rather be.”
    Blaine rolled the barbell in his mouth as I had seen him do a hundred times. The temptation to suck that tongue into my own mouth blossomed in my belly.
    “So, where do you want to be?” he asked.
    “With you.” There was no hesitation. No fear.
    “But you said…Kam…” he stammered. Blaine took a deep breath and took a step towards me, filling the air between us with scents of mint and spice. He lifted a hand and stroked the length of my cheek where a faint scar had been left behind. I didn’t even stop myself from closing my eyes and reveling in the feel of him.
    “Kami…” he whispered. “Why? Why now?”
    I opened my eyes so he could see the conviction in them. “Because you’re the exception, Blaine. And, honestly, I was a coward. I was terrified of feeling this way about you.”
    He cocked his head to one side and narrowed his eyes. “And how do you feel?”
    A flush crept up my cheeks as I reached up on my tiptoes and softly kissed his lips, catching him off guard. “I love you,” I murmured against them. “I love you so much it scares me.”
    He pulled his mouth from mine just far enough to meet my eyes. “Scares you?”
    “The magnitude of what I feel for you, the thought of losing you for good? Yes. Scares me to death.”
    My hands found his and I pulled them up between us, holding them to my chest. “Blaine, the scariest part about love isn’t love itself. It’s letting go and plunging into the unknown. It’s trusting someone with the very most sacred part of your heart. It’s allowing yourself to feel something foreign and uncharted, despite how much it terrifies the hell out of you.
    “The scary part isn’t loving you, Blaine. That part’s simple. It’s the fall. I fell a long time ago, and you know what? I’m not afraid anymore.”
    I didn’t have a chance to utter another word, as he pulled me into him and claimed my mouth.
    Yes, claimed .
    This was no kiss. Blaine marked me for life. Branded me like the vibrant artwork that covered his magnificent body, making me his forever. Every stroke of his