The Reunion

and no texts, no love notes from Claudia, not even a message asking if he’d got there safely which, when you thought about it, was pretty remiss of her. He had been driving up to the snowy mountains in a fast car, after all. He thought about calling her, but decided that by this time she’d probably be on the plane anyway. And he didn’t want to look needy.
    He had to force himself to play it cool, always had done. He wasn’t very good at it. He thought about his arrival just a few hours earlier, how he’d had all these things in his head that he wanted to say to Jen, to everyone, how he’d wanted to breeze in, nonchalant, clap Andrew on the back and give Lilah a wink and a kiss, and then he’d turned up and there was no one else there and he’d stammered an awkward hello and blushed and not known whether to hug Jen or kiss her, and of course he should have kissed her, but he went for the hug and it was awkward and just… ugh. He could feel his face colouring at the memory.
    And so he overcompensated, as he always had, withdrawn into himself, so when she’d shown him out here to the barn and told him that her dad had died, he didn’t say anything, he barely reacted, he didn’t take her in his arms and give her a kiss as he should have done, as a normal person would, as an old friend would. He just froze up and looked away and, Christ, what must she think?
    He picked up his phone again and rang Claudia’s number. Straight to voicemail, obviously, but then he thought, perhaps she was on the phone when he was calling, perhaps she was dialling him at that very moment, so he rang her again and it went to voicemail again, and now she was going to have two missed calls from him and he was going to look needy.
    The wind shrieked and he jumped. There was no way he was getting to sleep without another drink.

 
     
    Wednesday 21 February 1996
    Hi Dan,
    How’s it going? I can’t believe Norwich is really as terrible as you claim.
    Or perhaps it is, because you can’t have been going out very much – you’ve written loads. And it’s really good – I’m so impressed. You are a total star. Can’t believe how much it’s come on since last summer. My detailed notes are enclosed…
    As you’ll see, I can’t really find all that much wrong with it, although I can’t help feeling that it’s missing a scene or two. I know that you’ve written it in your achingly cool, European, slice-of-life style, and I like that, I just wonder whether one moment of drama – something frightening, life-changing, heartbreaking – wouldn’t make it more complete? I’m not suggesting you turn it into classic blockbuster, beginning-middle-end stuff. Anyway, as I said, notes enclosed, I think I explain it better in there.
    How goes the search for funding? I saw Lilah on the weekend, she was saying that she’d be happy to volunteer to help you pitch to City boys – she seems to think she has what it takes to sell to them. I think she might be right. She seemed better, by the way, a little less manic, although she did get really pissed at dinner. Things still seem tense with Andrew, she bit his head off when he suggested they go straight home after closing. Parties to go to, people to see, apparently.
    Talking of people to see, do you want to come to London this weekend? They’re showing
A Night on Earth
at the BFI from this Friday, and you’re the only other person I know who actually likes that film. Plus, Conor’s going to Ireland (again) to work on his brother’s house. Apparently they’re almost finished. I’ve been hearing that since last October…
    Conor’s well, although he’s working incredibly hard, so with that and all the trips to Ireland I feel like we hardly ever get to see each other. My work is
heinous.
The boss is the biggest bitch I’ve ever met. Thank God it’s only till the summer.
    Cannot wait until the summer! Do you think you’re going to be able to make it over to France this year? I hope so. I miss hanging out with you.
    How’s your love life, player? Get up to anything fun on Valentine’s Day?
    If you’re not up to anything fun on the weekend, come and play. And we can talk film stuff.
    Lots of love
    Jen

Chapter Four

    NATALIE COULDN’T SLEEP. She’d been lying there in the dark, watching the snow fall, listening to Andrew’s breathing getting deeper and slower as he drifted further into sleep. She was wide awake, limbs restless, blood throbbing in her head. She could turn on the